Its All About *Da

Double Happiness

Its been a long time..
Moments of Happiness..
My prayers have been answered..
"Bersyukur kepada Allah.."

Happines on 2 June 2006
- It was my younger sis, Mizaro's Birthday..
"HaPpY BiRtHdAy!"
Enjoy ur self-bought black long shoes..

- My BLaNKie fetched me from camp..
We watched "The Nun"..
At the east side, Tampines Mall..
I felt bad for he always pampered me..
But i just love the way he is..

- Around 2200hrs plus..
My first ever nephew came to earth..
Muhd Faid Hariz B Muhd Fauzi..
*I hope I got the spelling right..*
Hes superly handsomely cute and plumpy..
Dont believe.. Check this out..

Happines on 3 June 2006
- It was the moment of joy..
"LoVe is in the AiR"..
At my very own bus stop..
Ard 0030hrs..
He confessed..
I smiled and waited..
Man just don't get it..
I was still waiting..
"..Its sooo like secondary school.."
In the end..
He did..
I grinned..
From ear to ear..
Enuff said..

~BB HeaRTs BLaNKie Loads~

~ Smooching each other at 12:00 AM!! ~

State of Confusions

Friday, April 14, 2006

"Her Love for me,
is like the wind,
I can't see it,
But I always feel it.."

time passes so fast,
at times we didn't even realise,
dat the breathes we take,
eventually ends da day in an instant..

blood gushing,
my heart pumping,
my ears buzzing,
and my eyes were blinded,
but at the end of the day,
i sat to myself,
and i couldn't find a reason why...

you were everything to me,
and everything dat i'd ever dream of..
u may appear so sudden,
or even at the wrong time..
but at the end of the day,
i sat to myself..
and i hope dere was a reason why...

the times we shared,
were golden moments of my life,
it can be rewinded,
but it could never be replayed..
and at the end of the day,
i sat to myself,
and i knew that the moments were priceless..
and dere was always a reason why...

but as times moved on,
there were ups and downs,
we guided each other,
in this dark and massive storm..
when u fell,
i offered u my hand,
but when i fell,
u offered me yr arms..
and at the end of the day...
i sat to myself...
she is so special and extraodinaire,
and i knew there was a reason why...

i didn't know her dat much,
nor do i know everything about her,
but whenever she appears,
i felt as though i knew her for years..
people says dat i do not look like her,
but why does she look like me?

the wind became our symbol,
and the weather became our model,
it may rain and even be so cloudy,
but whenever she appears,
the sun emerge from the rain!it kills away all my pain...
people say i do not look like her,
but why does the weather mentions her name?

i remembered,at once..
i was helpless..and lost...
i couldn't go home..
i was peniless..and empty..
i thought it was the end of the world..
but when she appeared,
she helped me find my way home!
people say i do not look like her,
but why does she fight the world for me?

after all this questions,
my questions mixed with confusion..
confusion turns haywire..
and now i'm back inside the compass..
being a needle once more..
i thought dat i knew which direction where to go,
but where is she,my torch and my soul?

after this battle,
we lost each other..
distance began to seperate us..
and now we rarely talk to each other..
it's like we're living in pluto and mars,
while we're still living on earth!

after all the damage..
there is noone to blame..
except for myslef..
let it be my mistake..
i didn't make any move to save us..
how could i?
when dere isn't anyway to contact u?
but deep within i blame myslef..
distance may seperate us,
work and studies might push us away..

but in this special place of my heart,
u were always dere..
alive..
every minute,
and every moment..

there u will be..
the Heroine Of my Heart..
thank u..
and may god always guide u.."

-Ameer Hassaan

Lets hear on what I have got to say..

For the second time..
U posted for me..
With this..
I thank u..

U felt my love..
Like the wind..
But did I feel urs..
Even if I seek for the breeze..

Time passes so fast..
When we are together..
Somehow, u drifted..
Even if its for 2 weeks..

All my muscles tensed..
My feelings ached..
Knowing I will make a fatal mistake..
Just to know how badly u want me..

U are my only hope..
My only world and galaxy..
Tho I came at the wrong time..
U still accept me then..

I missed those times..
Where we met as different status..
The senority n juniority..
The singlehood n the one taken..

U neva fails to cheer me up..
Neither did I fail to ease ur problems..
We promised to brave thru storms n weather..
But look at us now..
Drifting apart from our very own ground..

I had no idea how I got dumb-strucked..
Just after knowing the 'culprit'..
Who wrote such stuffs in the appraisal..
Needless to say..
Chemistry flows thru the electricity to the eyes..

The wind is what we yearning for..
Cause that is what brings us closer to each other..
The message brought across..
"..Sealed with a kiss.."
It just kills the aches and pain of 'missingness'..

He sent me home..
Despite of being super late..
Offered him what he needed..
He returned an unexpected smooch..

I thought we knew where we were heading..
Boy, I was sooo wrong..
U cant even make up your mind..
To be with me or with her..
A good metaphor of an unsecured, confused needle..
In a good condition of a normal compass..

In this battle..
We have never lost each other..
It is just that we are not strong enough..
To hold each other strong back again..
And now slowly, drifting..
Away from our sights..

As a matter of fact..
After reflecting back..
I thanked Allah for it..
Its a test from him to us..
And we failed it..
Even though u tried to save it..
By contacting me..
And I tested u by not replying them..
It had failed the moment..
U stopped and felt lost..
Nevermind the pain..
I thanked its the past..

As for now..
Im glad I had expressed..
What i have wanted to say all this while..

I moved on..
And so should you..
Friends we shall be..

And I thanked for everything that had happened..
Cause thats where I learnt..
The beauty of an unrequited relationships..

~ Smooching each other at 1:28 AM!! ~

Wake me up inside

Cranky..
Jus lack of sleep..
I hope..

Anyways, jus felt like typing wat i felt rite now..
So wat am I feelin?!
Nothing.. Zero..
Hmmm..

I just cant wait to go back to HTA where I felt my life is well used..
I wanna feel the pain and comfort at the same time in HTA..
Im beginning to hate weekends where I keep lying down on my bed and look into space..
I just want to stay inside..
Its just much betta than to think of nothing but him..

How can I still think of him when he dont..
How can I dream of being wif him when he dont..
How can I eva wish to be by his side when he dont..
In the first place, who am I to him..

Dear Diario,
I used to write to u..
Now, Im just simply plain lazy and tired..
But then, I missed writing to u..
Pardon for my laziness..
Hope u feel me like the way u used to..
Haish..

I betta get going..
Hot iron is awaiting for me..
Uniforms are waiting to be ironed-smart..
Papers and books are waiting to be full of markings..
Bag is waiting to be full..
And here I am..
Wasting my time..
Okie.. Fine..

Before I go..
A very big shout out to all my peeps..
I miss u guys..

"HaPpY BiRtHdAyS to AlL mY FeLloW PeePs"
- Omar (2 March)
- Sarah (8 March)
- Hana (16 March)
- Firdaus (23 March)
- Zaihar (2 April)
- Adnan (8 April)

P/s: Did I miss out anybody?! Pardon me if I did.. And ermm, sorry if I didnt msg some of u to wish ya.. Busy wif in-camp trainings.. May all ur wishes come true.. Hugs n Kisses!!

~ Smooching each other at 3:10 PM!! ~

Cant get over it

Heyz..

Its been a long time..
Just to say..
Im dont feel good whenever i returned back home on friday..
I will be reminded, no matter what..

To someone,
I dunno how u feel and what ur thinking..
But I just cant get over that day..
Pls guide me..
I was not convinced..
I feel shitty and above all..
Should I move on or stay..
Im lost than ever..
I need someone to turn to..
A shoulder to cry on..
Someone to hug to..
Just anything that can ease off my mind..
Just someone..

But now, ur no longer there for me..
Neither will be in the future..
Sorry for my wrong deeds..
Thanx for everything..

Let me walked away from my Shane West and be the Leukemia Mandy Moore..

"Ku Seru" by Misha Omar
Ku membayangi jiwa hati mu
Tapi perpisahan menunggu
Ku ingin membelai mu
Namun kasih ku tiada restu

Diri begini kerna selalu
Di tinggalkan marah sengsara
Hingga hilang terlupa
Siapa aku sebenarnya
Sayang..

(Korus)
Oh dengarlah sayu tangisan ku
Mengapa degupanmu ku seru
Kerna kesepian nan berlalu
Kembalikan hidup yang ku rindu

Oh dengarlah sunyi tangisan ku
Kau tahu ku amat menyayangi mu
Pergilah kau bukan milik ku
Pulang pada yang mengasihiDiri mu..
Kesepian berlalu..
Maafkan daku..

Sampai di sini
Ku lepas kau pergi
Biar ku damai bersemadi
Luka mu ku mengerti
Kan ku hilangkan derita.. Ini

(Ulang korus)

Kau ku seru..

~ Smooching each other at 2:05 AM!! ~

My thankius to all

Okie, few hours from now, I will be at Prison HQ, then to Home Team Academy..
Goodbye to shaking leg..
Hello to the NEW World..

With these, I would like to express my greatest gratitude to those who wished me luck, spending time with me in one way or another and all.. Really thankiu guys.. U guys must take a very good care of yourself.. Hope to meet u all someday k.. Keep in touch ppl..

Taggers Replies:-
blog hopper:
Not really a pro dancer.. Just a freelance only.. All the best in dancing k..

Maz:
Hey, Im ok now and evrything is just niceeee.. Glad to spend time with u esp at the cineleisure.. hehe.. See ya ard..

hanani:
U take care aight..

a fellow clt:
Hey, thanx.. Got ur msg.. Ermm, do drop by and identify urself aight.. Thanx..

Sis_Dada:
I mish ya damn loads.. U take good care aight.. Hope to see ya ard..

Tha Clover:
I believe u got ur ans aight.. Take care Fizzy..

zaz:
Hey, u take good care aight.. Gonna mish ya too.. See ya soon k..

42:
Hey buddy, take care aight.. Cant wait for the jersey..

syamsinator:
Hey, mish ya too.. Take care aight..

LeRa:
Link u up soon k.. Take care..

effurr:
Its okie la gal.. U take care k sis..

chins:
Hey, Happy belated V day.. Hehe.. Gonna mish ya lame craps man.. Takle care dudette..

Pwincess:
Hey.. Take care gal.. Yep, prison la jawabnye.. Hehe..

~ Smooching each other at 7:29 AM!! ~

Clouded Minds - Vapour eyes

"As the fingers spent its time typing this words of mine..
The sorrowful tears bottling at the verge.."

Woke up early in the morning.. Rest for 15 mins here and there and finally decided to bath at 8.15am.. Was ready by 8.30am.. Woke up my sureties..

Signing up the Training Deeds today at 11am at Prison HQ.. Was eveready for it.. While waiting for my sureties to get ready, ate cereals while surfing the net.. Smily so early in da morning..

Drizzling by the time when we reached there.. Finished my lolli upon reaching.. Saw my senior Iskandar with his sureties.. Read documents, being briefed and sign docs..

My mind is whirling after the whole signing deed ended.. Like seriously.. But all that blown away by the wind when I rushed off to my self-declared last parade in BTS.. Or rather, my last time in NCC.. For real..

Wore the uniform for the last time.. Cadets shocked upon my presence?! Discipline down the drain but fun still need to go on.. Had fun with games and serious with the Part Ds.. Tell each and everyone about what is good and bad in their dressings.. Haish.. Teachers helping me out to boost my confidence for the Prison Career.. Rebuild the confidence in the Part B boys.. Acted as the CO for dismissal parade.. *Salutation*.. Went home with the cutests, so called bro and sis..

Back to reality.. I feel like breaking down any moment.. For real.. Once I embark on this new journey, I got to sacrifice everything.. No more of the mentions.. Dance, NCC, Hockey, TVs on weekdays, offers from outside companies to work as part timers and a whole lot of me will have to be erased for BLOODY 2 YEARS.. Else I got to pay back like 20k.. Why no more of the mentions.. Simply, I must not get injured outside of trainings esp when my ankles are much fragile rite now.. Tats not the saddest part.. Training extended to 5 months due to the moving Home Team to Old CCK rd in March.. Still, its not the saddest part.. I got to read, study and learn the law chapters which is freakin thick.. Not the saddest part yet..

I just cant put my mind to ease.. I freakin dunno what to be expected and what to expect from the Basic Officer Course.. Its like a whole new thing.. I guess Im being paranoid but Im really scared if I eva gonna screwed the whole thing.. A week of Orientation.. A week of Attachment.. Before the actual training start.. I dunno wat is wrong wif me.. Maybe I just need time to chill.. Im really scared.. No kid.. Aaaarrrgghhhh.. Feel like pouring then maybe I will feel better.. Just let me cry in silence..

Trying to smile.. :)

To those whose taking 'O' Level results tmr, all the best and may u get the grades tat u all have been wishing for.. Especially to my titans.. Goodie Luck!!

My sis msged the whole family that insya'allah a new born Adam will be gifted in june this year.. According to my kak, in the 3D image, he is normal.. Plush, he is a shy baby.. Aww.. How lovely.. I hope to meet my nephew soon.. Insya'allah.. Syukur pada mu ya Allah.. Sesungguhnya kau lah maha kuasa..

Oh, my dear sistas Sarah, Hana and Dessy askin me out for dinner tmr at Cityhall, Sakura.. And the Titans wanna meet up for dinner too at Cityhall.. Man.. Im really broke.. But tats not the prob.. I just too depressed to meet anyone for I dunno wats the heaviest thing in my mind tat could possibly bring my morale and dignity down today.. But I see how.. Maybe I meet my sistas..

Ok, enuff said.. My visions kept being blurred.. Cant bring down the tears.. Bottling up feelings with unspoken words..
I need someone to talk to..
I need a shoulder to cry on..
I need to be hugged now..

Drifted slowly, with head low, morales down, faded away..

~ Smooching each other at 11:00 PM!! ~

My Foreva PrInCeSs HaRyAnA

I cant get enough of her.. And now Im missing my dear Princess Haryana a lot..

Okie, so we went out today.. 2.30pm at Tampines Small Mac.. Headed to Sky Garden and reminiscing the memories.. Gosh.. From my prison application: from the signing up - 1st assesment: handing out docs - 2nd assesment: interview - 3rd assesment: job preview and fitness test and last assesment: Medical check up to couple of topics, summarised, the Princesses, Poly life, guys, my love life, her poly times, the TP dudes, cam whores and choco ice blended and one last thing:- my stomachache.. Haish..

Sho much fun.. We went to the fitness corner just to take loads of pics.. Then headed to Gazibo which happened to be another fitness corner and took pics again.. Tat is how bad our cam-whoring is.. Hehe.. And yah, my stomach had to spoil the day.. Haish.. Uurrrgghhh.. So we decided to head home and hour earlier.. Yeah, we acted like a les for a moment.. Hehe.. Jus u know tat put hand ard the other arm.. Nothing much la.. We both STRAIGHT okie.. Plus I got my syg okie.. Took pic along the way to Tamp int.. Haha.. Kewlness..

Enuff said.. Enjoy the pics..

~ Smooching each other at 11:59 PM!! ~